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what's in a name? x00xx

June 10, 2025

(i was in third grade when i became “jenny”)

i was born (and still am), jennifer ann rhode. my middle name is for my mother, also ann. my parents chose “jennifer” because they thought it was beautiful and clearly it was in the zeitgeist of 1968 as it was the 4th most popular name in america, topped only by “kimberly,” “michelle” and “lisa.” (i always assumed it was the MOST popular name as there were typically three to four jennifers in all of my elementary school classes, but apparently, it didn’t make number one until 1970. i definitely didn’t know that many kimberlys, but there WERE a lot of michelles.)

neither of my parents ever shortened my name… they gave me nicknames: “babycakes”  and “sweet pea” from my mother and “princess precious love” from my father, but they always said my full, proper name when speaking to me. my father used to sing it to me a lot as well. the song, “jennifer juniper” by donovan was released in 1968. i thought the chorus was “jennifer, juniper, la la la la la…” because that’s what my father sang, but it turns out there are no “la la’s” in the song, that was my father’s addition. the original lyrics are:

jennifer juniper lives upon the hill

jennifer juniper, sitting very still

is she sleeping? i don't think so

is she breathing? yes, very low

whatcha doing, jennifer, my love?

jennifer juniper, rides a dappled mare

jennifer juniper, lilacs in her hair

is she dreaming? yes, I think so

is she pretty? yes, ever so

whatcha doing, jennifer, my love?

i'm thinking of what it would be like if she loved me

uou know just lately this happy song it came along

andiI like to somehow try and tell you

jennifer juniper, hair of golden flax

jennifer juniper longs for what she lacks

do you like her? yes, i do, sir

would you love her? yes, I would, sir

whatcha doing jennifer, my love?

jennifer juniper, jennifer juniper, jennifer juniper.

jennifer juniper vit sur la colline

jennifer juniper assise très tranquille

dort-elle? je ne crois pas

respire-t-elle? oui, mais tout bas

qu'est-ce que tu fais, jenny mon amour?

jennifer juniper, jennifer juniper, jennifer juniper

* i was thrilled to see the french in there… maybe that was the inspiration for all my french studies later in life?

(the jennifer juniper album cover!)

(this is around the time he started singing to me…)

he also used to make up poems:

jennifer ann, jennifer ann

i’m going to love you as much as i can

jennifer ann, you’re so nice

you’re so nice, i’ll say it twice

this ditty was frequently recited to me when i was playing with my father.

it wasn’t until the third grade that anyone called me “jenny.” that fall, mrs. jones, my teacher, asked me if she could nickname me because she had a favorite student (i think jenny austin?) the year before and had grown really fond of the moniker. ever after, outside of my home, i was “jenny” or “jenny r.,” depending on how many other jennifers were in my class. i loved signing “jenny” on my papers because i could have so much fun making big, loopy “y”s that circled back under or turned into hearts. regardless, i would never have told mrs. jones not to change my name, even if i had hated it (unlike my spicy gen Z daughter who has very different kinds of relationships with her teachers) because that’s the way we gen Xers rolled.

(my class picture from third grade… mrs. jones is right in the middle. to her left is mr. calegari, our handsome principal. we were all in LOVE with him [i think A LOT of the mamas had crushes too.] he would come out to the playground at lunch sporting a corduroy blazer with suede elbow patches and his tom selleck mustache and kick one of our red, rubber dodge balls so far it looked like it hit the moon. all the kids would be swooning in admiration. a side note, one of my mother’s friends actually MARRIED mr. calegari much later and it is still one of my favorite love stories!)

i went all through high school as “jenny” (my father never approved of this, when friends would call on the phone and ask for me, he’d say, “there is no ‘jenny’ here, but JENNIFER is available.”) when i got to college, no one used first names at all… i was “rhode” full time.

(my giant cheer sweater with “jenny” on the front…)

(the even bigger cardigan with “jenny” on the sleeve… i keep offering them to lucy to wear on a game day and for some reason she hasn’t taken me up on it!)

post graduation, when i started working, i would introduce myself as “jennifer” because i thought it sounded more grown-up and professional. but almost immediately people shortened that to “jen.” so for the last thirty years i have mostly been jennifer or jen, except to my growing up friends who still call me jenny. i am really happy to be called any of these versions of my name (i DO care about how they are spelled, however… i am a ONE N jen, a TWO N jennifer and jenny with a Y.)

last summer we moved back to my home town in california and i am getting to spend lots more time with my childhood friends (who mostly live in and around the bay area) and they are introducing me to the friends they made here in berkeley while i was living in new york or amsterdam or boulder. of course, they are introducing me as “jenny.” i LOVE being jenny again (or more often) but it does sort of jumble me up when NEW people call me jenny because i’ve always used the way people address me as an indication of what era of my life they are from. my mom is always encouraging me to be less rigid (i have to say i DO find things like organized systems, spreadsheets, brand loyalty and vacuuming SOOTHING - the connector is that they restore or minimize change, which is terrifying, so i HAVE to maintain a certain degree of rigidity or i will completely fall apart!) so you can call me jen, jenny, jennifer or even, rhode, as long as you spell it correctly! x0x0x

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